Famous Quotes About Tubas

Steve Marcus · Post by **Steve Marcus** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 8:58 am

"If a man's crazy just because he plays the tuba, then somebody'd better look into it, because there are a lot of tuba players running around loose. 'Course, I don't see any harm in it. I play mine whenever I want to concentrate."

Gary Cooper as Longfellow Deeds in Frank Capra's 1936 movie, Mr. Deeds Goes to Town.

Any other famous quotes about tubas?

iiipopes · Post by **iiipopes** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 10:44 am

Tuba, or not tuba, that is the question: whether 'tis nobler in the minds of men to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous blurts and blats, or end them with a mighty blast; aye, there's the rub! - Anonymous

TubaRay · Post by **TubaRay** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 10:57 am

"You tubas suck!"--Teddy Jo Newberry(from my sixth grade band class)

OK, so it's not a famous quote, but you should have seen Teddy Jo. When I looked at her, I might have believed just about anything.

OK. OK. So she wasn't really in my band class. I made it all up. But you still should have seen Teddy Jo.

Joe Baker · Post by **Joe Baker** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 10:57 am

"It's not a tu-ba"

Joe Baker · Post by **Joe Baker** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 11:13 am

"The tuba is certainly the most intestinal of instruments, the very lower bowel of music."
- Peter De Vries
_________________________________
Joe Baker, who isn't saying what part of the anatomy a clarinet is...

windshieldbug · Post by **windshieldbug** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 11:20 am

"We Were Stupid Before Stupid Was Cool" - Tuba Jim & Roy

poomshanka · Post by **poomshanka** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 12:59 pm

"A pinhole in the right place on a trumpet makes the instrument unplayable. A bullet hole in a tuba is never noticed."

From "Les Brass"

MartyNeilan · Post by **MartyNeilan** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 1:06 pm

"A man must practice day and night to learn to play the tuba right
Its full of different valves and keys and other strange complexities
But when he's mastered it, alas
It soulds like an elephant with stomach gas"

As best as I can remember it from a MAD magazine of about 15-20 years ago. There were poems about a half dozen instruments in one segment. A handdrawn rotary tuba was next to it, hence the complexity part.

Doug@GT · Post by **Doug@GT** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 5:02 pm

A Garfield joke book I had in elementary school had a chapter on comebacks/insults:

"I'm as fit as a fiddle!"

"But you look more like a tuba."

tuba kitchen · Post by **tuba kitchen** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 7:28 pm

"vater unser, der tubist im himmel"

windshieldbug · Post by **windshieldbug** » Mon Feb 06, 2006 7:52 pm

"Aufenthalt weg vom WasserschlÃ¼ssel!"

Tom Holtz · Post by **Tom Holtz** » Tue Feb 07, 2006 11:58 am

From a Marine Band rehearsal long, long ago... the rehearsal is underway, and ahead of schedule, and Col. Bourgeois is ready to move on to the next piece.

Col. B: "Are we ready?

Band member: "Sir, the euphoniums aren't back yet."

Col. B: "Somebody call the euphoniums."

Jim Dickey, asst. principal oboe: (Stands up) "Soo-EEEEEEE!"

Kevin Miller · Post by **Kevin Miller** » Tue Feb 07, 2006 3:21 pm

Now THAT'S Priceless!!

Alex C · Post by **Alex C** » Tue Feb 07, 2006 3:34 pm

"The tuba in your hand is a mirror of the tuba in your head."

Arnold Jacobs

windshieldbug · Post by **windshieldbug** » Tue Feb 07, 2006 3:36 pm

"Softer!" - Conductor who shall remain nameless

Sally Larsen · Post by **Sally Larsen** » Tue Feb 07, 2006 4:47 pm

"The secret to happiness? I keep a spare tuba in the trunk of my car, just in case."
>Howard Hovey

Chuck Jackson · Post by **Chuck Jackson** » Tue Feb 07, 2006 6:49 pm

"Mr. Jackson, you are playing too loud and are covering up the dancers".

Charles Ansbacher to me at a rehearsal of the Nutcracker in November 1984 with the Colorado Springs Symphony. Charlie was a good guy, and he was dead serious. I played softer because I couldn't stop giggling.

Chuck"truth is stranger, and sometimes funnier, than fiction"Jackson

Brassdad · Post by **Brassdad** » Tue Feb 07, 2006 7:42 pm

I wanna play the tuba.....it sounds like a big FART

Attributed to my son when presented with the option of learning any brass instrument by his 6th grade teacher.
(not a famous quote - outside of my house anyway)

GC · Post by GC » Tue Feb 07, 2006 11:06 pm

oom; never pah

tubatooter1940 · Post by **tubatooter1940** » Wed Feb 08, 2006 9:46 am

An answer to the question, "Why would you bring a tuba with you?"
It's kinda like a hammer. When you need one, no other tool will quite do.