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I need a quick fix and I have no tuning slide grease
Help! perhaps something around the house?

tubaplyer wrote:I need a quick fix and I have no tuning slide grease
Help! perhaps something around the house?

Vaseline will work, used sparingly. Any white lithium grease will also work. Don't use too much--you don't want that stuff in the valves.

Rick "who has been known to use Campagnolo bicycle grease on slides in emergencies" Denney

... and if its a REAL emergency, valve oil, while far from optimal, will allow usage without seizure!

If you need something heavier than valve oil, plain old white lithium grease or even A&D ointment. Just be sure to wipe it off later when you get some real slide grease. You don't want to use moly grease because it's messy and the black stains are almost impossible to get out of clothing.

Stay away from stuff that can turn rancid--e.g. butter, shortening, olive oil, lard, etc. They'll probably work but they're also a breeding ground for bacteria.

Rick Denney wrote:

tubaplyer wrote:I need a quick fix and I have no tuning slide grease
Help! perhaps something around the house?

Vaseline will work, used sparingly. Any white lithium grease will also work. Don't use too much--you don't want that stuff in the valves.

Rick "who has been known to use Campagnolo bicycle grease on slides in emergencies" Denney

I use Phil Woods waterproof bicycle grease exclusively and it works great. Slides are fast and it seems to last.

How about toothpaste?

quinterbourne wrote:How about toothpaste?

Toothpaste is water-based and contians a light abrasive. By the time the water dries out, you'll find yourself with a slide firmly cemented in place.

Chuck(G) wrote:If you need something heavier than valve oil, plain old white lithium grease or even A&D ointment.

By A&D ointment, are you refering to the diaper rash ointment by A&D?
If so, I have used that stuff on my grandbaby's bootie, my lips after a four hour gig (not necessarily in that order or the same tube), and can't wait to hear if I can use it on my tuba slides.

I have never had a problem using regular generic veggie oil on my slides, just don't use too much. Just a light coat should do wonders.

How would some WD-40 do? Best for rotory valves and not pistons, I would assume. Would it affect slides at all?

DaTubaKid wrote:How would some WD-40 do? Best for rotory valves and not pistons, I would assume. Would it affect slides at all?

I don't think it would hurt slides any, but it's not the best lubricant--it's really intended as a water-displacing penetrating oil to get through corrosion.

I don't know how A&D Diaper rash ointment differs from the original stuff, but it's basically petrolatum:



If you've got some fishing reel lube around, it's great for slide lubricant, even when you have regular slide lube around.



Another possibility is gun lube, but I'll defer to some of our NRA folks for an opinion on that.

And if you're really in a pinch and none of the above are available, other alternatives: cooking oil, ladies' cold cream, even hand lotion.

Finally, just spit on the slides if you have to.

iiipopes wrote:And if you're really in a pinch and none of the above are available

Pull the dipstick out from a car and use the motor oil before anything biodegradable!

He did appear to be desperate in the initial post. You're right: few things smell worse than rancid cooking oil, something like rotting garbage, like beet tops, with a turpentine kicker.

OTOH, I am not a fan of using anything on the slides that may be toxic, either. So I also respectfully disagree with the motor oil, derivatives, and additives advice.

I continue to use plain old petroleum jelly, whether Vaseline brand or a generic equivalent. I know some places are too hot to use it when playing outdoor concerts, and others have their own favorites or reasons for not using Vaseline, but for me it has worked without a glitch for the @35 years I have played brass. It's cheap; it's easy to clean; the worst it will do if you actually swallow a blob of it is the same thing you take castor oil or mineral oil for; it is available everywhere, so even with the "emergency," replacement should not be far away; it doesn't eat your lacquer; if you properly maintain your slides it works as good as anything; if you need something with thinner viscosity it is compatable with adding a drop or two of a regular non-synthetic type of valve oil like Roche-Thomas.

"Guppy Lube" -- anhydrous lanolin mixed with mineral oil. Non-toxic and cheap.

tofu wrote:I use Phil Woods waterproof bicycle grease exclusively and it works great. Slides are fast and it seems to last.

Yeah, the green stuff works. I just wish it wasn't green.

But I've come to prefer lanolin-based slide greases.

Rick "who prefers the white stuff" Denney

Rick Denney wrote:

tofu wrote:I just wish it wasn't green

But then it matches the color of your slides!

iiipopes wrote:OTOH, I am not a fan of using anything on the slides that may be toxic, either. So I also respectfully disagree with the motor oil, derivatives, and additives advice.

You think that drop or two of Roche-Thomas isn't toxic?

I'm not too worried about toxic slide grease. But even if I did, the toxicity of even motor oil is pretty low in very tiny quantities. You don't want to breathe the fumes if it burns, but if you are moving your slide that fast you need a tuba with better intonation. And oil hardly evaporates, so even breathing in through the tuba won't get more than a few molecules. You'll get much more of the valve oil, and most of that is no less toxic than motor oil.

Rick "who doesn't lick his tuning slides" Denney

Rick Denney wrote:You think that drop or two of Roche-Thomas isn't toxic?

I'm less worried about slide lube toxicity than its potential as an irritant. It's a pretty simple matter to get slide lube on the fingers on a hot day and then wipe one's eyes with the same hand. It happened to me and I was almost blind with tears from the STP on my slides.

That's when I went back to lanolin and mineral oil.

Chuck(G) wrote:

Rick Denney wrote:You think that drop or two of Roche-Thomas isn't toxic?

I'm less worried about slide lube toxicity than its potential as an irritant. It's a pretty simple matter to get slide lube on the fingers on a hot day and then wipe one's eyes with the same hand. It happened to me and I was almost blind with tears from the STP on my slides.

That's when I went back to lanolin and mineral oil.

Is that a "Can I just do it until I need glasses?" joke?