TubeNet

We have 4 provincial orchestras. One as a tubist (former section mate of Bob Tucci in Munich) as its head administrator, another has a euphonium player (previously in the lifeguard band) in the same position. It also is about which skills you want to offer the market.

Klaus

The way I see it, you've got two choices.

1. To use your words, "man up and make a career change". This means finding another way to earn money, or getting educated in a field which you would like to earn money in. Your choice.

2. Find a way to rekindle the passion you once had for the tuba. This could mean re-tracing your steps to old gigs, teachers, colleagues. Maybe playing some places for free like you once used to do for kicks in school/university etc. Making the tuba less about earning money and more about enjoyment.

For the sake of your sanity, you need to change this situation, and you have the power to do it. Teachers who dislike playing their own instrument invariably produce lousy students. Kids are insightful; they know that you're not into it. And if you really don't enjoy playing gigs, there are many other tuba players out there who want to take your place.

That said, many of us have been through bad moments like this. I personally lived a similar situation for about a year or so, and the solution for me was finding other avenues of performance, and new people to play with. Changing my own scene freshened me up, and I started to find some joy again in both playing and teaching.

But if you really think there is no turning back, find a way to walk away sooner rather than later. Life's too short to spend the majority of your waking hours doing something you hate, and it will have a negative effect on your downtime away from work, whether you notice it or not. Big mortgage? Sell the house, buy a smaller one. Learn to live smaller whilst you study/work lower paying jobs etc etc. There is always a way to change your situation.

And you can always come back to tuba playing. Your chops will always be there, you just might need to blow the dust off them...

I hope this post helps you to find some clarity.

Andrew (hoping that didn't come off too preachy)

Everything Andrew wrote plus some questions and an upfront apology/excuse. I don't know you or the steps you may have already taken before posting on the forum and have no wish to annoy you or preach to you.

Is it professional music in general or just the tuba that has you down?
Do you have a regular gig or is it the freelance searching that has you down?
Have looked into other studies that may give you a different career path that can fit in around your current job?
Have you spoken to your family friends etc as the best advice will come from those that know you.

I am an amateur player and playing the tuba is my escape from the rubbish that I have to suck up in my professional life do you have any hobbies or past times that could help make your job more bearable?

My best advice would be start closer to home with the people you know and who know you either a fellow pro your family or a friend if this is not possible then look for some professional help doctor/therapist/career advisor/life coach/pastor

I don't hate the tuba, but I did hate what I did for a living in my first career. I found the key to the next career among my friends.

As with your situation, employers had no way of connecting what I was doing with what they needed done. But friends were able to help make a case here and there, and eventually one of them got me in touch with the right people and vouched for me, and I was able to make the switch.

So the lesson of my experience is to tell your friends and acquaintances that you're trying to make a change and ask for their help.

tubaduder wrote:I have a problem. I hate the tuba. That might not be a problem in and of itself but, ten years ago, the 18 year old version of me made the decision to make it my job. I really should man up and make a career change, but for the past decade, the only jobs I have ever had have been playing the tuba or teaching other people how to play the tuba.

What do you hate about the tuba?

But an even more pressing question is, how in the world did you ever achieve the ability to do it professionally if you hate it? If you are that capable of imposing your will on your ability to be motivated, learning how to do what you would prefer to do should come easily.

I've met a lot of old pros who put down their instruments when they retire. In talking with them, it seems to me that they don't necessarily hate the instrument, but they hate the business of music. After doing it for years, however, they so connect the instrument to the business that they have to walk away from all of it as soon as they are able to. A few pick it up again and rediscover their love for playing the instrument once it is divorced from the business of doing so. Some move on to other arts. One I know has done so, and now makes a business of that other art, which seems to me even more likely to burn him out than the business of music did. Sometimes I think pros ought to learn how to be an amateur.

Steve Jobs tells us to keep looking until we find a living we love. I personally think that's advice that can be used by only a few, and even in his case what he said he loved doing (creating new life-changing products) and what he actually loved doing (managing a large corporation to achieve a dominant commercial position) were not the same. Did he love the creativity or the competition? My instincts suggest that the former gave him satisfaction, but the latter is where he had the emotional connection. Few can attain that sort of a role, and most people do work they are good at, and derive the satisfaction they need from it (in addition to steady pay), without feeling the compulsion to love it in an emotional sense.

Maybe you are expecting the wrong things from your work. Nobody owes you happiness, but millions of people decide to be happy and committed to their work even though they have a job that is just a job.

Rick "whose career choices have targeted new business situations and roles rather than new skills or expertise" Denney

Where do you live? Maybe a move to a bigger city would be a good inspiration?

Apart from that, maybe go back to school or just get *some* other job and see where it takes you. Most of the excellent musicians I know make their money doing things other than playing or teaching tuba. Make it your number 1 activity and not your career, and that stress of paying the bills is gone.

Or, you're only 28. Have you considered a military career?

DP wrote:

tubaduder wrote:[...] ten years ago, the 18 year old version of me made the decision to make it my job. [...] but for the past decade, the only jobs I have ever had have been playing the tuba or teaching other people how to play the tuba.

I happen to be a "professional" at this, OP. We can have a discussion about it over a few drinks if you like.

I think Rick made a salient point when he mentioned the Steve Jobs quote. People, especially when young, expect to find a "calling" which when fully cultivated will allow them to be fulfilled and to earn a living. Several things may happen as a result of this approach.

1. You find an avocation that you love, are able to earn enough of a living doing it to be happy, and you continue to love doing it.
2. You find an avocation that you love, are able to earn a living at it, but you grow to hate that thing because you HAVE to continue to do it. You become resentful that this thing that you used to do for love you now have to do whether you are in the mood or not. Eventually you decide to do something, anything else because you can't bear to continue on your original profession.
3. You can't decide what else to do, so you pick a major in college based on something that you like that seems to be the most likely to earn you a good living and spend your life doing something that you barely tolerate, but earn some or lots of money then retire and try to find a way to do something you love to do for the rest of your life.

Or some combination of these.

I think you need to ask yourself if you are experiencing number 2 or 3. If it is 2 you could find some way to regain the love that you originally had. If it is 3 then it may be time to re-evaluate what you want to do for the rest of your life. People can and do change careers at any stage in their lives. A degree or even years of experience should not be the only deciding factors as to what you do going forward.

I don't think this is a troll.

I got my degree in music (violin.) I found out I absolutely hated being a professional musician. At age 32, I went back to school, spent seven years sleeping on the floor and living out of boxes, and came out with my BSEE. I did not "love" that career either, but I was much better suited to it.
MA

No, I don't hate the tuba. But I have gone on long runs of not caring about it. I went on those long stretches because I really had no need to practice it. Don't have an orchestra to play in, not interested in playing in the community band around me, quintet fizzled out, about 3-4 gigs a year. As a full time public school teacher, I just didn't have the need to practice regularly. Sure, I'd bring it to school to demonstrate and I would practice here and there, but nothing serious. Futzing around with a few excerpts which I am bored to death playing for all these years - and for no real reason. The politics of the music scene suck. I waited and waited for an opening in a local regional orchestra (player was old and I knew that he would have to retire soon). Checked all my sources to find out if and when there would be an audition. E-mailed the group once a year since they didn't seem to advertise anywhere. Got no response. Then out of the blue, there's not 1, but 2 tuba players on their roster. I didn't even get the chance. Pissed me off. It's not like the opportunity come up very often. Would have been nice to have been informed. That was the last straw.

So - I think I may have solved my problem. Summer of '10 I bought an F tuba and then I sold my C tuba. I have found a new interest in playing tuba by practicing solos. Finally, some music. While I'd love to play in an orchestra, I no longer obsess over it. I play because I like it. If I don't feel like practicing, I don't. If I do feel like it, I do. Very simple. Less jealousy, less disappointment, less practicing things that don't matter, less guilt.

I realize that my system can only work if you don't make your living through playing. But I think the point is that if you want to re-kindle your interest, you have to shake things up.

Stefan

After six years of university, and a couple years of trying to start a freelance career, I came to hate "the tuba" too. Not the instrument, but the social idea of "the tuba" and its place in the music business - by which I mean the "art music" business which is controlled by universities and symphonic institutions.

I hated that I was one out of hundreds of people like me that was expected to fight for table scraps.
I hated that I had no creative input in the music I was playing.
I hated that so many of my colleagues were socially awkward people who didn't live in the real world.
I hated that we all played the same music, badly, at recitals that no sane person would ever want to sit through.
I hated playing the same excerpts over and over and over and over.
I hated that nobody under 50 cared about what I did, unless they had a political interest in caring, and that my main demographic was literally dying off.
I hated that the only cultural product I was capable of making had very little cultural relevance to the rest of the world, and was completely overshadowed by pop culture.
I hated the awkward conversations with people on subways, who asked if I played in a band, and looked puzzled as I tried to explain what I was trying to do with my life.
I hated the stab of jealousy and shame when I saw brilliant musicians using cutting edge technology to reinvent music.
Most of all, I hated how we all just pretended that everything is fine, and that this is the way it was SUPPOSED to be, and that it's the only way to success and actualization, and that any other career is a failure.

Eventually I figured it out, and realized I needed to get off the predetermined path to success that 18-year-old me had started down - and that teachers had encouraged me down - and figure out a different way to be a musician. The things that are important to me - cultural relevance, social value, creativity - were not forthcoming in the orchestral grind. Recognizing that I was on the wrong path, and finding the right one, took a few years of very painful soul-searching. But now I love the tuba again!

The moral is: the music business is big, and you are in control of your career. Not your teacher, not your family, not your old self, not your resume - by which I mean, the fact that you've invested time learning a specific job does not obligate you to stay in it for the rest of your life. If you want to do something else, for god's sake do it, go back to school and spend a few years learning new skills - it's really not that much time in the grand scheme of things. You'll be in your early thirties and have a whole life of happiness ahead of you.

(By the way - if anyone is offended by my characterization of the music business: I understand that I am unfairly exaggerating and generalizing. But these generalized perceptions were brutally real to me, and they created real, crippling anxiety.)

kontrabass wrote: I hated the awkward conversations with people on subways, who asked if I played in a band, and looked puzzled as I tried to explain what I was trying to do with my life.

Inevitably, when I tell someone that I have a music degree they ask: "What instrument do you play?" Not only do I have to explain what a euphonium is. (I just say it's a small tuba) I also have to tell them there no job prospects as a euphonium player in Canada.

tubaduder wrote:...I have a problem. I hate the tuba...
...Somebody somewhere has to have encountered this. Any advice?...

Well, sort of. I did not hate the tuba but the trombone. Your situation does remind me about how things went on for me. Now, after almost 30 years I am still playing the trombone, and have seen the light in the beginning interest for tubas...

For me it started out in a professional symphony orchestra a year at age 17, then the royal academy and freelancing many years and after that a position in a major symphony orch. After a couple of years as a freelancer I did really, really hate both the trombone, the playing and music, but always trying to do a good job though. Looking for opportunities in other directions, nothing. I realized that the music education and work had not trained me for other jobs in the community. Bla bla bla. Nowadays, when gotten older and hopefully, maybe, a bit more mature and experienced I have begun to like the trombone, playing and music a lot. In fact I can not think of anything else to make my living on besides the playing and the music.

So if you can make your living on/with the tuba, chances are that you now are encountering a hump in you life and that you later on will begin to like what you are doing again. That may take some time and be a hard and boring period and you may later on regret that you did not toss out your tuba and everything around it, starting out in a new direction. This may happen more than once, or not, over your lifetime. But, if you do that you may also later on regret that you did not continue with the tuba, and then it may be impossible or at least not so easy to start over...

For me today, nearly every day, not all though, when I wake up I really want to start making music. In the hate/down period it was absolutely disgusting to wake up knowing that I must try to make music to get food on the table. Nowadays I am very glad that I did not stop playing and working with music, even if some weeks are not so fun with music I do not like, bad conductors or something else. All in all I can not think of anyting else to do.

So if you are absolutely clear over that tuba is not your future, then begin to switch immediately else accept that there are down periods in life when the situation seems more or less hopeless. Just get some serious thoughts once more about the alternatives before you decide. Things may/will be better later on. A word of warning though, alcohol and drugs are never a solution. Otoh music, and playing, may work like a drug:-)

Two things comes to mind, 'the grass is always greener on the other side', and 'music is life'.

Just my 2 öre