One night after repeated hands, the trombone section and I also agreed not to play. We did bring the horns up, however. And sure enough, just like your example, we were still "too loud". So we told the genius that henceforth we only play "one on a part". "
MUCH better" was the result
Then there was the gentleman that was told that Samuel Barber's
School For Scandal overture was written his dog, Scandal, who was taking obedience classes. This was duly repeated to the audiences. After all, Samuel Barber was from West Chester, PA, which is about 15 miles from here, so it MUST be true...

Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow, but only to be troubled and insecure?