TubeNet

Don['t remember if this was posted here, but here it is anyway...
Alabama:
Hell, Yes, We Have Electricity.
Alaska:
11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!
Arizona:
But It's A Dry Heat.
Arkansas:
Literacy Ain't Everything.
California:
By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda!
Colorado:
If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother.
Connecticut:
Like Massachusetts,
Only The Kennedy's Don't Own It, Yet.
Delaware:
We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water.
Florida:
Ask Us About Our Grandkids.
Georgia:
We Put The Fun In Fundamentalist Extremism.
Hawaii:
Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru
(Death To The Mainland Scum, Leave Your Money)
Idaho:
More Than Just Potatoes.
Well, OK, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
Illinois:
Please, Don't Pronounce the "S"
Indiana:
2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
Iowa:
We Do Amazing Things With Corn
Kansas:
First Of The Rectangle States
Kentucky:
Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
Louisiana:
We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos,
That's Just Our Tourism Campaign.
Maine:
We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
Maryland:
If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It
Massachusetts:
Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's
Michigan:
First Line Of Defense From The Canadians
Minnesota:
10,000 Lakes...And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes
Mississippi:
Come And Feel Better About Your Own State
Missouri:
Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work
Montana:
Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-wing Crazies,
and Very Little Else.
Nebraska:
Ask About Our State Motto Contest
Nevada:
Hookers, Poker, and Wayne Newton!
New Hampshire:
Go Away And Leave Us Alone
New Jersey:
You Want A ##$%##! Motto?
I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto
Right here!
New Mexico:
Lizards Make Excellent Pets
(Dr. Jerry Born assures me that the actual motto is:
Land of the flea
and home of the Plague.)
New York:
You Have The Right To Remain Silent,
You Have The Right To An Attorney...
North Carolina:
Tobacco Is A Vegetable
North Dakota:
We Really Are One Of The 50 States!
Ohio:
At Least We're Not Michigan
Oklahoma:
Like The Play, But No Singing
Oregon:
Spotted Owl...It's What's For Dinner
Pennsylvania:
Cook With Coal
Rhode Island:
We're Not REALLY An Island
South Carolina:
Remember The Civil War?
Well, We Didn't Actually Surrender, Yet
South Dakota:
Closer Than North Dakota
Tennessee:
The Edyoocashun State
Texas:
Se Habla Ingles
Utah:
Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
Vermont:
Ay, Yep
Virginia:
Who Says Government Stiffs
And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?
Washington:
We have more rain than you do
West Virginia:
One Big Happy Family...Really!
Wisconsin:
Come Cut The Cheese With Us!
Wyoming:
Where Men Are Men...
And The Sheep Are Afraid

Reminds me of some dumb laws...Here's Iowa and Nebraska...
Iowa:
It is a violation of the law to sell or distribute drugs or narcotics without having first obtained the appropriate Iowa drug tax stamp.
A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public.
One-armed piano players must perform for free.
Kisses may last for no more than five minutes.
Tanning bed facilities must warn of the risk of getting a sunburn.
A board was created to regulate among other things, hearing aids.
Ministers must obtain a permit to carry their liquor across state lines.
Doctors who treat a person with gonorrhea must report this to the local board of health and include the disease’s “probable origin”.
All boxes used to pick hops must be exactly 36 inches long.
Nebraska:
Persons with gonorrhea may not marry.
It is illegal to fly a plane while drunk.
If a child burps during church, his parent may be arrested.
It is Illegal to go whale fishing.
It is illegal for bar owners to sell beer unless they are simultaneously brewing a kettle of soup.
It is illegal for a mother to give her daughter a perm without a state license.

My favorite of the ones I listed is that it's illegal to go whale fishing in Nebraska...
Find me a whale in Nebraska and I'll quit laughing about it...

schlepporello wrote:Back when I was hunting on a regular basis, elk hunting was perfectly legal in Texas and there was no closed season on elk and no bag limits. The only elk I have ever seen in Texas though have been in a caged area and usually in a zoo.

But were there still elk hunters? I bet not...and they'd likely get arrested due to trespassing at a zoo if they tried to shoot elk that were fenced in.
tubaguy"who hasn't seen a whale EVER in Nebraska...not even in a zoo"9

ken k wrote:Florida:
Ask Us About Our Grandkids.

Stephen Wright wrote: Grandmother: I'm going to give you fifty dollars, but don't tell your mother!

Me: It'll cost you more than that.

On Missouri, the official motto is, of course, "Show Me," referring to opportunists after the Civil War trying to speculate business deals, which the natives wanted something more tangible.

In recent years, this has informally been modified to, "Put your money where your mouth is."

Maine:
We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster


Friends in Maine have reported that the snow is up over their windows this year!!!!!!

Where I've lived...

Indiana: "Kentucky got all the front porch washers"

Michigan: "We can see Alaska from our backyard"

New Jersey: "Lemme ax you somtin' "

Pennsylvania: "Where Arlan Specter seems normal"

Delaware: "Hey- Rhode Island is even smaller"

California's state motto actually is: Eureka - greek for, "I have found it."
Looks like they are in the process of losing it.

Alabama's is, "We dare to stand up for our rights."
We might want to try that... and soon.

tubatooter1940 wrote: Alabama's is, "We dare to stand up for our rights."
We might want to try that... and soon.

AMEN!

Vermont: The other, smaller Wisconsin.

Hartford (Connecticut) : At least we're not Brigeport.

ken k wrote:Texas:
Se Habla Ingles

Not in McDonald's, Wendy's, etc.

South Florida:
"Se habla ingles? "

Illinois: Recently vacated senate seat for sale! We "can't just give it away for F****** nothing!"

I was born, raised and educated in "The Land of Opportunity", which I promptly left for a better opportunity.

Actually, my favorite one for Arkansas is "Thank God for Mississippi"...lol

The little missus is from Wisconsin. She says the state motto is "Come smell our dairy air.".

NC_amateur_euph wrote:The little missus is from Wisconsin. She says the state motto is "Come smell our dairy air.".

NC_amateur_euph wrote:The little missus is from Wisconsin. She says the state motto is "Come smell our dairy air.".

Wow. There really must be a lot of dogs, as well as cows, up there...

windshieldbug wrote:

NC_amateur_euph wrote:The little missus is from Wisconsin. She says the state motto is "Come smell our dairy air.".

Wow. There really must be a lot of dogs, as well as cows, up there...

I'd bet it's "nothing to sniff at" ...