Give me advice on how to make things better
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Maybe I am getting soft as I near 40. Many of us "older" and / or "wiser" posters probably didn't get our heads screwed on straight until sometime in our 20's or 30's. (My threads are getting stripped from being screwed and unscrewed so many times.)
Perhaps we should cut the youngsters more slack and, if they are behaving like total idiots, just ignore them?? How many mistakes did we make, but did not have the available technology to spread them internationally or immortalize them?
Marty "glad Al Gore had not invented the Intenet when I was a teen."
There are many "young guys" here. Off the top of my head, I can think of two who participate frequently and those are the only ones I can name but I know there are lots more.
The fellow who just left without a trace was cut *incredible* amounts of slack. Many TubeNetters tried to help this fella with the tuba and getting along in life and, I understand, a few others tried helping him in private. There were a couple of times I thought posters were piling on and said so. I'm afraid the guy is going to have a tough time meeting his goals mainly because his lack of self-awareness.
Most here only know half of the story.
It is a shame that people like James think the way the do. It really is. It is an even bigger shame, though, that others get sucked up into trying to help him that they themselves are hurt. It is just like trying to help ("fix") an addict. There is a point where one just has to walk away and sever all ties (after warning, though).
When it comes to old/young members, I believe there needs to be an acceptance that you can't categorize the entire population of either end of the range. Many young kids (teenage and below) consider the adjective "old" as a single, defined and unalterable set of characteristics for a person. I also believe the same thing happens on the opposite end (to what extent, though, I don't know).
I am all for tough love and the value of teaching someone how to do something as oppose to doing it for them. I also believe that we all have basic human rights that include the right to be respected regardless of life choices. I think this is coined somewhere in the phrase "Be civil.".
These are just the things that I try to hold true in my day-to-day life. I believe Tubenet is fine as is and the people who leave on grounds of hostility or disrespect towards them should better the understand the value of the human opinion.
Seriously, my good friend,
That crap didn't work here or here . In fact, it lead to additional deterioration.
I've been deservedly called down for my idiocy and lack of discretion here, and I have not been particularly young since the commencement of my participation. If an oldster can learn from correction, certainly a youngster can as well.
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This does not pertain to TubeNet, per se, but to society in general:
1) Very few people acknowledge that true respect and reasonable differences of opinion are not inconsistent terms, but are in fact necessary to the growth of a person, family, community, country, even civilization itself.
2) Even fewer people want to recognize, including myself stepping into the mess at times, that they need to be corrected, and that constructive correction and criticism, and acceptance on the other side of the same, are also vital to personal growth.
3) Sometimes, you just gotta let someone make their mistakes, as those around me have let me make mine through the years, so the lessons to be taken from them are better learned. That includes on a bulletin board. Today's technology: internet bulletin boards. Yesterday's technology: small town grapevines where the same kinds of mistakes were immortalized in a different fashion, but equally so. The only difference is that the small towns tended to forgive and help the person finish growing up, where there may not be that opportunity on a bulletin board.
If the phrase "Kinder and Gentler," is meant in the context of maintaining respect in the dialog, no matter how dichotomous, great. But if it is meant in the context of milquetoast, then that's just a waste of bandwidth.
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