For old guys and gals only... 8^)

[BavarianFanfare]

For me, it was a host of obstacles to overcome when I was younger. First, access to a tuba and a tuba teacher and having the money to do so was not available when I grew up. To my father who earned the majority of the income, music in general, tuba, or musical instruments meant virtually nothing and a waste of time. Baseball, Football, and Basketball, were what was expected. To this day, I will not watch any of these sporting events. The extent of my sports is the Olympics. Attempted college after high school, and I was a good student. However, I dropped out due to my overwhelmingly difficulties with Algebra, and worked many menial jobs afterwards. Tutoring, studying, etc. were not successful. Later at 30, when I had myself tested, I discovered I was severely dyslexic. I went back to college after I married at 33, and completed my Associate in Arts degree at a large community college in my area with High Honors. I had great moral support from my wife and mentoring from a professor who became a close friend, and seized an opportunity to study with a great professional tubist. I practiced and followed what both these men said, even though I worked nights, went to class all day, and was married. It was tough. Because of the hard work I put in, I was able to get an academic and music scholarship to a univeristy close to where I live, and am majoring in Music Education. I am really living the musical life that I always desired to do. I love playing tuba and I have to work hard at it. Will I ever play like a Gene Pokorny, an Arnold Jacobs, or a Norm Pearson?, not likely. But I sure am willing to listen and learn from these great performers and others to be the best that I can. For the rest of my life, I want to pass on my love for the music to others of all ages and play as much as I can and have fun. After I finish my B.M., I hope to earn a Master's degree in Jazz Musicology, or more broadly, Musicology. My point in all this is work hard, seize opportunities that may come your way, and always give your best even when you feel your worst, as was stated by a previous post. I now have a five month old son, and hopefully he will love music as much as his dad does. He will have the love, support, and encouragement from both me and his mother that I honestly never had. I do not feel sorry for myself or expect others to, sometimes we must get creative with our situation or wait for a better season.

[lgb&dtuba]

Nothing. For better or worse, we lived the life we created. Might as well be satisfied with it.

Chuck

What he said.

[TubaRay]

*GO TO CLASS - even if you feel like your head has been used as a soccer ball and you feel like you have wool socks on your tongue and teeth. Take two ibuprofen, drink a can of V8, and GO TO CLASS.

Your entire post had some really excellent advice, however, I believe this one tops it all. I have two sons that I gave that advice to. I emphasized it as they were preparing to go. I really emphasized it as they were actually leaving. One son took the advice. The other did not. One son graduated. One son did not. Would you care to guess which son graduated?

[Slamson]

Ah, if I had only practiced more....

In addition to the obvious, I MIGHT have married my accompanist (lots of my friends did and they've spent SO much less money on recitals than me!) OK, that one's tongue-in-cheek....

I would have come to my lessons armed with music my teacher knew NOTHING about! Two reasons for this - one, to show that I'm proactive, and two, I shouldn't have relied on my teacher to spoon-feed me literature. I'm still catching up from what I should have been exposed to in undergraduate school.

I would have been willing to drive to the four corners of the earth for a gig... and I wouldn't have turned my nose up at anything, including a telethon for unwed porcupines.

I would have gone deep into hock to get an F tuba before I graduated.

I would have taken lessons in High School with Harvey back when he was teaching at Chautauqua and I lived 5 miles down the road (I REALLY regret that one!)

I would have kept the Holton E-flat that my teacher said sucked (wrong!)

and finally -

In 1981 would have taken my CC, hopped on a plane to Frankfurt, and started looking for gigs until my $$$ ran out. Might have been a disaster, but think of the lessons I would have learned!

Of course, I can speculate til the cows come home - but I'm sure not complaining about the way things turned out. As long as you're playing, what else matters?

terry solomonson

[sloan]

*GO TO CLASS - even if you feel like your head has been used as a soccer ball and you feel like you have wool socks on your tongue and teeth. Take two ibuprofen, drink a can of V8, and GO TO CLASS.

Your entire post had some really excellent advice, however, I believe this one tops it all. I have two sons that I gave that advice to. I emphasized it as they were preparing to go. I really emphasized it as they were actually leaving. One son took the advice. The other did not. One son graduated. One son did not. Would you care to guess which son graduated?

On the Leno show a few days back, Robert Downey, Jr. related the advice his father gave to him when he was failing at High School:

"Go every day - or quit".

I can't really answer the question posed by the OP - because I don't really have anything I *would* do differently - even though I could probably make up quite a few good-sounding half-truths. For example:

*continued with piano (lessons) instead of quitting at age 14 [because my teacher wanted me to increase my practice time from 2 to 3 hours per day...when I was actually practicing for about 1 hour immediately before the weekly lesson]. But then...I would never have had the opportunity to play the Sousaphone.

*played in the newly formed Wind Ensemble (and played an actual *tuba*) in college. But then...I would not have had time to discover my life's work (not music, I'm afraid).

*found a way to play tuba after college, instead of taking 25 years off. I did find a way to continue to hack away at piano - but tuba required finding someone to play *with* (and that would have made a great difference). But then...I might not have discovered Squash - which made me healthy and fit enough to survive a serious bout of "old, fat, and defective" when that became my fate. [for those keeping score - 2 months after surgery I picked up a squash racquet for the first time in 5 years and am back on the way to thin(ner!) and (semi-)fit.]

*<insert several similar (non-music) professional decisions that have made my career "interesting".>

and so on.

What's the point? The choices cascade and take you to unpredictable places. The one thing that has been nearly constant for me is the only career advice I give to young folk:

"Find out what you want to do 24/7. Do it. Get good at it. Eventually, someone will pay you for it."

You may make stupid choices - but they will be *your* choices. You can't truly predict what a choice will lead to far in the future - but with my life plan you know that what you are doing *right now* is what you truly want to do.

Not my line - but one I heard recently: "No one ever said on his deathbed, 'I wish I had spent more time at the office'". I've been on TWO near-deathbeds, and this is definitely correct.

Don't practice because it will prepare you better for a career as a pro musician. Practice because practicing is *what you do* (and what you *want* to do). Tuba players *play the tuba* [by definition!]. It's the people who live in the practice room *because they want to practice* who win the auditions. The others would be better off looking at how they are actually spending their time and adjusting their sights.

Once again:

"Find out what you want to do 24/7. Do it. Get good at it. Eventually, someone will pay you for it."

Do that, and you won't be saying "if only I had..."

[SplatterTone]

I would have gotten into Computer Science long before I actually did.
That and marry Ann Coulter while she was still nobody.

Was this supposed to be about music?
I took two years of Music Theory from Maestro Franco Autori. Fabulous. Absolutely fabulous.
http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.h ... A966958260
http://www.music.buffalo.edu/bpo/autori.htm

I have long regretted not having taken orchestration from him. But after two years of music majoring, it was becoming clear to me that this was a field that would probably offer a rather bleak future. So, a change of plans occurred.

[TubaRay]

IThat and marry Ann Coulter while she was still nobody.

Ah, yes! I wonder how many hundreds of guys have this regret.

[NC_amateur_euph]

Yes, life just is and we can't change what happened.

Nevertheless, I regret acting like a 17-year-old when, at age 17, I heard our (overworked, underpaid, unappreciated) HS band director say something with which I disagreed to one of the beginner bands (did I mention that the director was overworked, underpaid, and underappreciated?). In the fullness of my 17-year-old wisdom, I marched myself down to the office and dropped band for the following year (my senior year). What the director said was wrong and I was going to show him.

I had achieved some success and assumed some responsibilities in band at that point and now realize that I may have left my overworked, underpaid, unappreciated band director in a bit of a lurch. I may have deprived myself of some good experiences as well. But it's my childishness toward the director that I rue.

He is gone now and I am playing the coda of my life (here's hoping it approximates another full movement) so there's nothing substantial I can do about the situation. On reflection, I do try to be a little less quick on the judgment trigger so maybe that ended up being a teaching moment after all. Mr. Booth - you taught even when I wasn't listening.

It feels better after 'fessing up. Sort of like spinning the prayer wheel.

[NDSPTuba]

Live within your means, always. I used the old credit card and later student loans to fill my "got to have its" need and It started a waterfall of debt that to this days I'm still paying for.

I too, had a father who placed no value on music and because of it, instead of going to a good music school and going into music like I wanted, I went to a good school and went into engineering. Needless to say I had no interest and wasted 2 and a half years of my life before going into music like I was meant to do. Having those years with no direction caused a lasting effect on my life, as I took on bad habits to fill the void, that I had a very hard time shaking for years after I got back into music. Not drugs or anything like that, but compulsive buying and skirt chasing. Which kept me distracted from being in the practice room doing what I wanted to be doing and should of been doing. Not to mention debt and heart ache.

Be grateful for the gigs you get. I got a gig in an Air Force band and because it wasn't "at the level I aspired" I totally discounted its value and would do practically anything to have it back at this point. While embouchure dystonia is what ultimately ended my playing career and not leaving the air force, the bridges I burned while in the Air Force band still haunt me to this day.

[Todd S. Malicoate]

Be grateful for the gigs you get. I got a gig in an Air Force band and because it wasn't "at the level I aspired" I totally discounted its value and would do practically anything to have it back at this point.

Ditto. I'm still beating myself up for dismissing a gig that would have gotten my foot in the military door "because I can win a DC job." What an idiot (and, what a different direction my life might have taken if I had taken that job).

[sloan]

IThat and marry Ann Coulter while she was still nobody.

Ah, yes! I wonder how many hundreds of guys have this regret.

42

[TubaRay]

I have learned to love whatever is on my stand at that moment

I believe this is profoundly important. It helps one to have the proper attitude to bring to the rehearsal or gig. This leads to performing the music, virtually any music, at the highest level possible. And for those doubters out there, and you know who you are, this is possible.

[tubacrow]

Scooby,
I see what you are going for, but I was not sure I wanted to share until you reminded me one of the most important things we can do is help those who are crossing the same paths that we have.

What have I learned that would change my past. i think the biggest thing I have learned is to listen. I did not and do not have all the answers, and if I would of paid attention all those years ago, I would maybe have reached my goals sooner. Many people have offered lessons that if I were a wiserman, I would of took to heart. Many friends and professors have offered sound advice and tips to improve myself as a musician and a person.

I of course do not mean that we should listen without evaluation. Not every piece of advice is a gem, and just because someone has professional infront of their name does not mean they first, have the contextural understanding to offer their most sound advice, and second know you as a person well enough to be correct, but if you have a friend whom knows and understands completely, I would suggest giving their words consideration.

I also would like to stress how much first impressions will shape how others see you. I was a different person when I did my undergrad, and maybe not the best or most serious tubist. A fact that has come back to haunt me. Recently 2 people from my past were asked about me and they spoke very ill of my skills. Neither have heard me play in 12 years, and during that time, I became serious about my instrument and growth as a person, have took lessons from leading tubists, and have held minor position while working as a full time music educator. In short I am not that teenager they remember, but they remember who they met and have not allowed for growth. I must admit I did feel both of these people were friends and had my best intentions at heart, but it is clear now they will speak behind my back. This is result of the system and first impressions. So for the young please try to make a good first impression, for the older folks (those who sit in, near, and around the ivory towers) remember you are not who you were. Everyone changes as they pass through this world, but if you feel you must speak ill of people have the consideration, and courage to speak to these people personally and do not pretend to be their friend.

[PWtuba]

So, as a round up thus far...

Practice more, study some piano and theory, actually go to class, keep playing when possible, listen more, be brave.

Sounds like good stuff.

Also sounds like no brainers...

[WakinAZ]

I guess I should have stuck with music as a major. I bailed freshman year when I developed a confidence problem and started getting scared about 3 to 7 more years in the practice room followed by a hand-to-mouth existence as a "gigless wannabe". Being a young, stupid and arrogant performance major, I thought I was too good for education and did not see myself in the military.

As things turned out, I never made a huge amount of money anyway. Oh well, I have fun with it now that I don't to worry about earning my living with it.

I got lots of good advice, chiefly from one of the greatest tubists of all time, and I ignored it all. What doesn't a 19-year-old kid know about life? Pretty much everything. What can you tell a 19-year-old kid about life? Pretty much nothing.

So this is for all us folks looking back to reminisce over - would've, could've, should've... I try not to give in and try to live in the now, but I am weak sometimes.

I recently got laid off and am now looking for work. This experience has made me focus on my career goals and, more importantly, on the most important thing of all - family. I don't spend much time worrying about what-ifs, but it feels good to vent a little.

Oscar Wilde quote - "The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself."

Eric "who still finds playing the tuba to be very satisfying; it just took him a 17 year hiatus to realize it" L

[scottw]

There is no point in second-guessing your past decisions, true. Only hope that, if you see something happening that reminds you of a mistake you made long ago, you will have the wisdom and experience to make a better choice this time. I can't change the fact that I agreed to major in double bass instead of tuba [shortage of one, surplus of the other]. I can't change the fact that I spent 25 years playing the bass because it paid far better than did the tuba. Nor can I change having stopped playing altogether for over 20 years in my effort to provide for my family.
But, if I were a young guy asking me for advice [not too likely!]I would tell them to just play as much as they can and enjoy every moment of it! I know I am.

[tubatooter1940]

Every man has his story to tell. Most are worth a listen.
I pray everyday for the wisdom to keep my mouth shut and my ears and options open.
Music has been a good pursuit for me. Never being able to learn it all held my interest and always will.
Same thing with sailing...
Ann Coulter has the potential to make love hurt the way it probably should.
"Sink your teeth right through my bones, baby..."
John Cougar Mellencamp

[rocksanddirt]

Geeze, Scoob, you did not mention in the oldsters only bit that it was for youngsters! I was sharing how I felt personally about my past. I am where I am because of my brilliant moments as well as my F-ups. I was sharing how I feel. I would not have said the same things if you had said that you wanted us to share with the younger folks what to avoid doing in life. Very different.

Sorry I misunderstood.

my observation is that only a story like you shared provided the 'youth of america' the proper understanding of choices and how the effect the future. Life is full of what if's when you look back. Sharing what some of those are, and why you made some of the choices you did is what might help some of the youngsters who read it to be conscious when they make thier choices in life. And IMO it is knowing what your choices really are that makes for a happy and content life.