If you won the lotto...

[Michael Bush]

If you buy a $5 lottery ticket, you have a 100% chance of losing $5.

That's the logic I use, so someone else is probably going to have to start that foundation and buy the cool Oberloh York.

[Bob Kolada]

Excellent!

Apart from the obvious self sustainment, firearms caches, sick horns,... I would love to take Dixieland/jazz lessons from a really good player.

[eupher61]

If YOU won the lotto, I'd attempt a little blackmail. I don't know, at this point, what it may entail, but something will come up, I'm sure...

Bob, no need to take lessons from anyone. Find some leadsheets or piano scores, find some recordings, and play the bass lines as if they were a Sousa march. Then, learn the melody, and start improvising off the melody. Keep time and play the right pitches. That's all there is to it. Except all the other things.

[Ben]

1:175,000,000... you have a greater chance of getting struck by lightening. There you have it.

[bort]

You can't win if you don't play.

[k001k47]

If I won the lotto, I'd buy all the tubas Al Triplett owes everyone

[Kevin Hendrick]

You can't win if you don't play.

"Of course the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you -- if you don't play, you can't win."
-- Robert Heinlein (from The Notebooks of Lazarus Long)

(and, by extension, if you don't play, you also can't lose ... as per bloke's post above)

[WilliamVance]

I think I would start a "Bill's halfway house for any good, vintage tuba". I always want to see what gems have been left out to die in this great country of low brass.

[Alex C]

I'd be too busy dating Victoria's Secret models to worry about tubas.

We need a 'like' button.

[jmerring]

I'd get
Yamaha 822 F silver piston
Fafner BBb
PT-6 CC
Mirafone Firebird F
MW 2182 F
Eb Sousaphone
Holton BBb John Kuhn "Chief" raincatcher
5/4 Rudy Meinl CC four valves

Others

Greedy like tucker; aren't you?

[tubajon]

I don't get the tucker reference but, yes, I guess I'm a little greedy. Kind of obsessed with tubas. I esp like horns that are easy to play, but I also like the garden hose variety.

[Mitch]

Keep my Thor and Petrushka. Buy back my old HB-2P for whatever he asks (NB- that's ONLY if I win the lottery, so let's not get carried away), get a Miraphone Siegfried. Hunt down the CC once owned by Dan Anderson that I once had on a 2-week trial and pay whatever the current owner wants. Still kicking myself for not buying that one when I had the chance. I'd be happy forever with those 4 horns. Maybe pick up a few different F's (Gronitz, B&S, Firebird) for whatever I feel like playing on a given day, and find a neat little vintage British Eb just for fun.

I play in the Wheaton Municipal Band. (Playing at MidWest this year for anyone wanting to go to the 8 am Saturday concert. Yeah. GREAT time on the schedule. 'Cause no one goes out late on Friday or anything...) Great group, less-than-ideal performance venue. I've already joked with/told someone my plans for rebuilding the place in the event the Lottery Fairies see fit to shine on me. So I'd kinda sorta be obliged on that one. But happy to do it.

And I buy tickets every once in a while. I don't really have any vices - hardly ever drink, never played a round of golf this year - so a dollar here and there, I figure, what the heck. People do win them. Sure, it's more likely than not a dollar I won't see again, but I've won a number of little amounts here and there, anywhere between $2 and $100, so why not. If I use it in a bar to buy a beer, we all know the only by-product that's coming from that. To each his own.

[alfredr]

I came up with this plan about 20 years ago. I'm still waiting to implement it.

There was a small town nearby to where I was living at the time that was trying to sell $3,000,000 in municipal bonds to build some infrastructure (road, power lines, gas, etc,) as their part of a deal to get a glass manufacturing factory to build there. At about the same time, the PowerBall jackpot got to about $160 million. So, my plan was to take my lottery winnings over the 30, or whatever, year payout, and with several million a year coming in, invest in tax-free municipal bonds such as that, not buying the whole thing, but being able to ensure that good projects that would bring jobs to places in need would get funded.

Besides being able to do a lot of good in small communities, I would also set myself up with tax-free income for the rest of my life.

I haven't been able to implement it yet, as I said. I still think it's a good plan. But I often don't buy tickets either.

[Brian C]

1. Win Powerball.

2. Buy ranch in East Texas.

3. Buy many tubas.

4. Prepare for zombie apocalypse.

[sousaphone68]

1. Win Powerball.

2. Buy ranch in East Texas.

3. Buy many tubas.

4. Prepare for zombie apocalypse.

What is your preference edged weapons or projectile weapons?

[Chadtuba]

1. Win Powerball.

2. Buy ranch in East Texas.

3. Buy many tubas.

4. Prepare for zombie apocalypse.

What is your preference edged weapons or projectile weapons?

You of course must have both. Eventually you will run out of projectiles and will need edged weapons, however, I would much prefer projectile for as long as possible to keep them at a distance for as long as possible. When you run out of projectiles though, just let all that pent up rage loose and go to town on them there zombies in some good old fashioned hand to hand combat

[sousaphone68]

I think you would have to have a katovel or a Crikate
One thing that band camp teaches is never mess with the back row as a mouthpiece in a sock is a formidable weapon

[ken k]

i would hire myself a concert band of all the best players i know and play all the great band pieces I love and maybe some I dont love.

as for tubas a miraphone 187 would be nice to use in the above mentioned band....

kenk

[jmerring]

I don't get the tucker reference but, yes, I guess I'm a little greedy. Kind of obsessed with tubas. I esp like horns that are easy to play, but I also like the garden hose variety.

The tucker was a clean version of the f***er word.

Sorry that you did not get the joke.

[OldHorn]

I'd hunt for some tuba playing nymphos, preferably with their own horns.