the elephant wrote:[quote="Capt. John Francis Xavier "Trapper John" McIntyre"]Look, mother, I want to go to work in one hour. We are the Pros from Dover and we figure to crack this kid's chest and get out to the golf course before it gets dark. So you go find the gas-passer and you have him pre-medicate this patient. Then bring me the latest pictures on him. The ones we saw must be 48 hours old by now. Then call the kitchen and have them rustle us up some lunch. Ham and eggs will be all right, steak would be even better. And then give me at least ONE nurse who knows how to work in close without getting her tits in my way.
[/quote]
Pros "from Dover" being the Dover Air Force Base, about a half-hour south from here.
Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow, but only to be troubled and insecure?
I absolutely love the M*A*S*H movie (which I only saw AFTER having seen many many many episodes of the TV show), but never got around to picking up the book. I've been looking for a new book to read, and that very well may have to be it. I'll look for it at B&N.
This is from 'A River Runs Through It" by Norman Maclaen. I have read this book more times than any other I own.
"The body and spirit suffer no more sudden visitation than that of losing a big fish, since, after all, there must be some slight transition between life and death. But, with a big fish, one moment the world is nuclear and the next it has disappeared. That's all. It has gone. The fish has gone and you are extinct, except for four and a half ounces of stick to which is tied some line and a semitransparent thread of catgut to which is tied a little curved piece of Swedish steel to which is tied a part of a feather from a chicken's neck. . . .
Poets talk about "spots of time," but it is really fishermen who experience eternity compressed into a moment. No one can tell what a spot of time is until suddenly the whole world is a fish and the fish is gone. I shall remember that son of a bitch forever. "
I have been asked(via PM) to explain my comment about there being no jungles. Just as is true for many expressions, we have now gone to the more PC terminology. It seems that we are living in the most "enlightened" times in all of history. We have finally figured everything out. Here are some examples:
oriental = Asian
jungle = rain forest
fireman = firefighter
teacher = educator
janitor = custodian
personnel department = human resources(or HR)
bum(or hobo) = homeless person
used car = preowned car
star player = superstar
This list could go on and on, probably longer than any of us would care to read. I fully realize that not all of the above list are PC names. Furthermore, I really don't mind the changing of the language. What bothers me are the sometimes obvious political agendas that are behind the changes.
Anyway, I was just joking in my above response on this thread, however the joke was based on a serious thought. I am not attempting to stir up a hornets nest or anything. I'm just trying to have a little fun with one of my pet peaves.
When I was in college, I worked at the Texas DPS (as a civilian)in Austin. My sgt. - one of my favorite people in the world (RIP) - used to tell us smart-assed college guys:
"Son, you do that again, there'll be a wholesale *** whippin' and you're gonna provide all the *** !"
TMurphy wrote:...and also, Dude, Chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature. Asian-American, please.
-Walter Sobchek
And I guess we no longer have jungles.
"Political Correctness is a doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical liberal minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the propostition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."
bloke wrote:A friend of mine finally got his wife's great uncle to quit saying "zipper-haid". NOW you want him to say "Asian American"...!?! What if a Chinaman lives in Australia?
True enough....but, on the same token, what if that "Chinaman" is actually from Korea???
Greg wrote:Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
George Carlin
Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
George Carlin
Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
George Carlin
Gotta love this one:
Got into an argument with my Rice Krispies today...I distinctly heard them say "Snap, crackle, **** you."
George Carlin
This just in from the National Pancake Comittee, it reads "F*** Waffles"...
...This just in from the National Waffle Foundation: " French Toast Sucks"
Ithaca College, B.M. 2009
University of Nebraska - Lincoln, M.M. 2017, D.M.A. 2020
Wessex Artiste
Wessex "Grand" BBb, Wessex Solo Eb, Wessex Dulce
