Good Tubist = Good man ?

[ubq]

I'm a musician who works in the real estate business. I'm very often disappointed 'cause most of the time people arn't trustworthy and kind, and there is a loss of integrity too. It made me think about "my" tuba world were I had very positive and very negative experiences. I found that the "biggest" names are the most kind, most available, helpful people.
What are your experiences?

Thanks

[tubeast]

Same here.
Met very kind great tubists.
Found no unkind people among the not-so-great tubists as well, by the way.

[Steve Marcus]

Good Tubist = Good man?

I would include "good woman" in your query.

Every female tubist whom I have encountered has been a very decent person.

Other attributes are not under discussion here.

[Dean E]

. . . . I'm very often disappointed 'cause most of the time people arn't trustworthy and kind, and there is a loss of integrity too. . . . Thanks

That's a depressingly pessimistic, narcissistic, general statement to make about people. When I feel like people do not live up to my expectations I ask myself, "Self, why am I feeling so angry or sad about people?"

[brattom]

Without naming names, let it be said one can find varying degrees of a--holes in or near central Ky, Illinois and North Carolina.

Robert I. Coulter
(battening down the hatches)

No disrespect intended, but with a comment like that, perhaps you should add yourself to the list.

It would be better if you either named names or didn't say anything. I know several tuba teachers in Kentucky, Illinois and North Carolina and you managed to implicate all of them at once.

Tom Bratten

[iiipopes]

Hmm. Yeah, to point directions without specifics of person or incident looks like a passive-agressive issue to me.

[Rick Denney]

I'm a musician who works in the real estate business. I'm very often disappointed 'cause most of the time people arn't trustworthy and kind, and there is a loss of integrity too. It made me think about "my" tuba world were I had very positive and very negative experiences. I found that the "biggest" names are the most kind, most available, helpful people.
What are your experiences?

Real estate and other sales professions live and die by the numbers. That's just a fact of life. I have no expectation whatsoever of kindness from a salesperson which whom I'm dealing. I'm only interested in professionalism so that the deal is done honestly and efficiently.

Thus, sales professions attract those who are comfortable measuring their effectiveness on the basis of numbers. Not many have that comfort; I sure don't even though I'm constantly being put into the sales mode against my will.

Musicians share with salespeople the skill of being comfortable communicating with people, whether by fast talking or by musical expression. There are musicians who are not comfortable with people in that way, but they face a constant struggle. Even with this shared characteristic, though, I find that musicians are more like teachers than salespeople--they'll often give it away and forget the numbers, just because it's what they do.

Tuba players have fallen in love with sound to such an extent that they don't really mind being the humor element in much music, don't really mind having roles that are often boring, and don't mind the role of supporter rather than supported. I think the musicians who tend to the arrogant also gravitate to roles where others support them. Nothing is more pathetic than a tuba player who takes himself too seriously.

And nothing builds camaraderie like shared persecution.

Rick "who is laughed at for many other things besides just tuba playing" Denney

[Rick Denney]

That's a depressingly pessimistic, narcissistic, general statement to make about people. When I feel like people do not live up to my expectations I ask myself, "Self, why am I feeling so angry or sad about people?"

Huh? What you prescribe is far more likely to be depressing. I'd really be depressed if I spent my time looking for ways to blame myself for others who choose to be a jerk. But I often do just that.

I think it's enough to make sure our own behavior is exemplary, and then refuse to feel guilty on behalf of someone else.

Rick "not angry or sad about people, but about what they often do" Denney

[MaryAnn]

I've found that there is pretty much a gaussian distribution of personalities in any profession. That is, most will be "average" in most respects, and there will be a few on the fringes who are either saints or devils. The categorization of saint or devil depends on one's own place on the spectrum.


MA

[TubaRay]

I dunno, I hear that some tubists are truck drivers.

I guess there are exceptions to every rule.

[TubaRay]

I have it on good authority that the guy in the Mississippi Symphony is a complete jackass.

I'm not sure I can trust that you are telling the truth. I once knew a fellow like you.

[iiipopes]

Just curious -- when were these two unfortunate encounters, and what brands of tubas were the gentlemen espousing?

[Chuck(G)]

And nothing builds camaraderie like shared persecution.

Rick "who is laughed at for many other things besides just tuba playing" Denney

Yeah, like being asked at a social gathering by one of the violinists in the orchestra if you played a musical instrument.

FWIW, I rationlized this to myself by speciulating that she probably wasn't aware of anyone who sat further back than the second row.

[Dean E]

That's a depressingly pessimistic, narcissistic, general statement to make about people. When I feel like people do not live up to my expectations I ask myself, "Self, why am I feeling so angry or sad about people?"

Huh? What you prescribe is far more likely to be depressing. I'd really be depressed if I spent my time looking for ways to blame myself for others who choose to be a jerk. But I often do just that.

I think it's enough to make sure our own behavior is exemplary, and then refuse to feel guilty on behalf of someone else.

Rick "not angry or sad about people, but about what they often do" Denney

Rick, nothing was said about feeling guilty or blaming myself for others' actions. There's no sense in giving that kind of control to anyone.

For me, maybe not others, introspection is an enrichening, acquired art--an ongoing, lifelong process. The unexamined life is not worth living.

Negative thinking (i.e., not trusting others) is bound to harvest negativity from others. Why dig that hole any deeper? What's the payoff? Isolation? A wide and safe personal boundary? Insulation against dealing with real issues?

[TubaRay]

Both the HPO and the BCP use a jug, so there would obviously be no tuba...??

Would that be a BBb jug or a CC jug?

You see? There's the sort of thing those darn truck drivers bring up. Next thing you know, they'll ask if the jugs are lacquer or silver. Personally, I would prefer the jugs not be lacquer or silver.

[windshieldbug]

OK, what about the valves then?

Jugs? Wide open. Don't you truck drivers know how to have ANY fun!?

[TexTuba]

I know this subject has gone to the humorous side(when do they not ) but here's my view. I've met some good tuba players that were complete jackasses. I've also met some not so good tuba players who were great people to be around. The bottom line is that people are people. You've got the nice ones and the ones you'd rather punch in the mouth. How a person might play the tuba has NOTHING to do with how they are.

Ralph

[tubatooter1940]

Great posts on this thread. Two from Rick Denney and Mary Ann on the brilliant side and Schlep's humor has me sliding out of my chair.
I agree, sbring, that tuba players seldom dissapoint.
But there is always that ten percent!
I find lady tuba players to be vivacious and fun. I also found killer players on any instrument that I have been fortunate enough to meet to be mostly generous and caring to their audience and fans as well as their families.

[windshieldbug]

Tubes!? I though we were talking about Netters!