Overcoming nerves in a lesson

[dmeacham5]

I take private lessons and have had lessons for several years now, however I seem to always get nerves in a lesson and don't play as well as I could does anyone have any experience with this? I don't get nervous at concerts after I start playing but I still get nervous in my lessons any help would be appreciated!
Dmeacham5

[hup_d_dup]

When I switched over to tuba I started lessons almost immediately so that I could get better as fast as possible. I was very nervous during these lessons. Even though I wasn't playing well during this early period of my tuba life, I was much more comfortable in the band I was in; in a large group, the mistakes you make are usually not earth-shattering, and you can lay back on tough passages. You said you aren't as nervous in concerts as in lessons: I'm assuming you are playing concerts in a group, not as a soloist, so maybe this applies to you also. My guess is that if the stage was darkened and a spot light was aimed at you during a solo, you would be as nervous as you are in a lesson.

Something that helped me and is continuing to help me tremendously with nervousness is playing in a quintet. Although it's not quite the same as solo playing, everything in a quintet is much more exposed than it is in a large group. Rehearsing and performing in a small group has allowed me to be much more relaxed about all my playing, including during lessons.

Hup

[hbcrandy]

As a teacher, let me tell you what I would tell any of my kids of I found out they were nervousI'm here to help you, I want you to succeedIf I say something that's critical of your playing, it's because you came to me looking for honesty and answersNo matter how you play, I've heard worse, and if you care about improving yourself, just try your best and practice hard and we'll find the path to improvement.

I second this. Remember, your teacher is your ally, not your adverasary. If you had no playing problems and were always great, you would not need your teacher.

To approach the issue from another angle, I will tell you what Abe Torchinsky once said to me in a lesson, "Randy, do you know what the best cure for nervousness is? Preparation!"

So, practice well and trust your teacher. He or she is on your side.

[Jay Bertolet]

To approach the issue from another angle, I will tell you what Abe Torchinsky once said to me in a lesson, "Randy, do you know what the best cure for nervousness is? Preparation!"

Mr T. really knew what he was talking about! Extra preparation can do nothing for you except improve your performance. There's also another aspect to this. Do you practice performing? I have this discussion with my students all the time. If all you do in a practice room is practice, that is all you will ever perfect. Once you know (or think you know, as the case may be) a piece of music, you should try and practice performing the piece. Do all the things you would normally do when you perform the piece you're working on. Start at the beginning, don't stop for anything, pretend your favorite tuba critic is listening to your performance, and even record it so you can go back and evaluate it yourself.

What I usually find is that players rarely do this level of preparation and are not playing the piece as well as they think they are in the practice room. When they sit down in the lesson (or performance), the results match what they are doing in the practice room. All that really changes is how closely they are paying attention to every detail of what they're doing. If they scrutinized their practice the same way as they perform, they would achieve better results in the final product.

[kontrabass]

I don't think it's helpful to say things like "get over it" and "it's silly to be nervous". Nervousness happens and the feelings that cause it are real. As a musician we put pressure on ourselves to be "the best". Part of the journey of musical growth is learning how to DEFEAT nerves. Not "get over them" or dismiss the feeling. But to acknowledge their cause and deal with it at the source.

When I was in music school I put a lot of stock in the theory that I was going to be a Great Tuba Player. When I was made aware that my playing didn't live up to the high standards I was setting for myself, it caused terrible anxiety. Which resulted in putting more pressure on myself. What was happening, was that I didn't accept myself as a human being who was capable of failure and had to work hard to achieve results. I put myself above humanity and constructed an illusion because it was easier than facing the possibility that I might be just an Average Tuba Player. And I got down on myself because I believed I was "too good" to be feeling nervous. I made the mistake of tying my identity and self-worth to my level of success on the instrument. This is not a healthy place to make music from!

What I'm trying to say is, of course it's important to "care" about what you're doing and be serious about your growth. But if you're nervous at lessons, you may be feeling like there is more at stake than there really is. Part of the process of learning is making mistakes and going through periods where you're not sounding good, and accepting failure without letting it destroy your self esteem. It's messy. And if you're afraid of showing that part of yourself, it's going to make you nervous. So have a conversation one day. Say, "I don't know why, but I always feel nervous when I come to these lessons". For me, as a teacher, I would take that opportunity to introduce my student to concepts of performance psychology and help them through it.

Another possibility - If your teacher is casting judgement on you or making harsh comments about your playing in a way that makes you feel bad, then naturally you're going to feel like you're not in an emotionally safe place at lessons, and the nerves are your body's way of telling you that you may need a new teacher. A good teacher will feel like an ally, fellow traveller, trusted confidante on this journey.

[Untersatz]

You have received some excellent advice from some of the best instructors around,
but I have to agree with Wade on this one! There really is no need to be nervous at
a lesson, but if you are, try to to think of a reason why you would be nervous. Is your
teacher intimidating to you? Are you not comfortable playing in front of someone one
on one? Have you discussed this issue with your instructor? Maybe if you brought it out
in the open, it would ease the tension & after a while I think you would be able to look
back & laugh about how silly that was. Wade is right.........move on, but find out why
you are feeling this way. I would definitely bring it up with your instructor & with his
reassurance, you should be able to get passed this.

just my 2 cents worth............good luck

[Doug Elliott]

Players come to me for lessons to fix their PROBLEMS. It does nobody any good for me to hear a student at his or her BEST.

I'm not going to hire you - somebody else is. I don't care how well you can play; I care about fixing your problems so you can play BETTER. Maybe nerves are the problem, but it's usually other things that actually justify the nerves.

I'm sure some students take lessons to impress their teacher... I had a student like that once. I think the second lesson was his last.

[tofu]

I take private lessons and have had lessons for several years now, however I seem to always get nerves in a lesson and don't play as well as I could does anyone have any experience with this? I don't get nervous at concerts after I start playing but I still get nervous in my lessons any help would be appreciated!
Dmeacham5

If I were you I'd actually bring this up with your teacher. Bringing it right out in the open and facing it head on with the person you are experiencing this with will go a long way towards getting over it.

[XtremeEuph]

Remember, your teacher has probably heard much worse sounds than youll ever produce.. maybe . But even in your practice room, thats the time to experiment and sound like junk at times. Just remember that they are there to give you ideas to try. They may not work. you'll play better if you TAKE RISKS!

[Mojo workin']

.

[PMeuph]

...You know what they say advice on the internet, it's worth exactly what you paid for it....

_______
Truthfully, I think there's been a combination of really good advice, of adequate advice and of truthfully crappy advice. The OP will have to parse through it on his own and find what works for him and disregard the rest.

For my part, I use to be nervous. There are even moments, when I thought that I had overcome my nerves, just to have them pop up again. To me, I overcame my difficulties with practice, with patience and with learning to control everything I can and to let go and to accept control of what I can't.

I can control how much time I practice, how long before a concert I have coffee, how clean my suit is, etc.... I can't control the audience, I can't control the room, etc.... I had to learn to accept that, that might be part of your issue, or not...

Be prepared for your lesson, visualize beforehand if you need it, practice as much as you can and make sure that in your practice you try things as many different ways as possible... If this doesn't work, and you're still nervous after a couple more lessons, consider seeing a counsellor or therapist...

[Reptilian]

Just imagine your teacher naked during a lesson.

[Mark]

Just imagine your teacher naked during a lesson.

Depending on the teacher, that may or may not help.

[Untersatz]

Just imagine your teacher naked during a lesson.

[TubaRay]

Just imagine your teacher naked during a lesson.

"...You know what they say advice on the internet, it's worth exactly what you paid for it...."
--PMeuph

[Eric Fritz]

The best solution for nerves is better preparation. Also remember, your teacher wants to help you. He wants you to succeed so relax and enjoy. Good luck.

[Reptilian]

Just imagine your teacher naked during a lesson.

"...You know what they say advice on the internet, it's worth exactly what you paid for it...."
--PMeuph

You and I should party sometime. They wouldn't be able to handle us.

[elihellsten]

I think lessons is pretty much like going to the doctor. You have to be honest about your flaws, because they're there to help you. Just play as well as you can and take it from there.

[MikeMilnarik]

Practice. Then, practice some more. Once you've done that, practice even more! You'll see the nervousness disappear fairly quickly.

We've all gotten nervous in our lessons with our teachers. The better prepared we are the less worried we will be that we'll hear something we don't like from our teachers and/or the less we will feel like we've let our teacher down.

Practice.

Mike Milnarik

[ScottM]

Dead on. The only time I got nervous for a lesson was when I hadn't practiced.
ScottM