Does anyone know if...

[windshieldbug]

"You haf again given the "hand" to the trombone section, Mr. Bond... vill you never learn!?"

[Mikelynch]

I'm sure that Acme makes something that could be adapted. Check with W. E. Coyote (might not be a member of the board).

[tubeast]

I suggest hydraulic solutions to problems of conductor-disposal.
Advantages:
- no flying/falling conductors, so no risks of damage to audience, orchestra members and room decoration.
- disposing process is slower, providing more entertainment value.
- after conductor has been taken care of, device can be taken back to car plant and put back to its original use.

Disadvantage: clean-up after use takes more trouble. But I´d prefer stained suit over broken Roof any day.